It’s been about a year since I started ModernHouseDad.com. One of the best things about having a website is finding out about how people arrive at your site. People search for ridiculous things. Below are my favourite google searches that brought people to ModernHouseDad.com this year. I truly hope people found what they were looking for.
Top Google Searches For ModernHouseDad.com In 2013:
- “How to be cheeky” – I have a British following searching for insight on how to be cheeky. Apparently there is an art to cheekiness. I learned everything I know from a cheeky little engine named Thomas.
- “How to be chicky” – It doesn’t matter if you can’t spell “cheeky” because “chicky” brought up the same results for one lucky bloke.
- “Chinese gender calendar” – Don’t waste money on 3D ultrasounds. You can find out the sex of your baby here.
- “Feline PTSD” – Apparently I have become a bit of an authority on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in cats. Who knew so many people were worried about cat psychosis? This post gets multiple daily hits.
- “Who did the blue jays play in regina sask” – I don’t remember either, but what a great experience it was for me as a kid. Following this post, I had a “twitter conversation” with my childhood hero, Roberto Alomar. Unbelievable!
- “Watch your shadow physically” – I’m still trying to figure out what this means, but here is where the searcher landed.
- “Vomit stained skin child” – Need I say more? This is by far my favourite search term of the year (and it was my favourite post to write).
- “Regina rough rider wind socks” – Nope… no wind socks here.
- “Can someone get sick being egocentrism” – I certainly hope not. I do know, however, that grandparent egocentrism brought my wife to her knees.
- “Thomas and friends drug innuendo” – Boum chicka boum boum. Don’t inhale the steam.
- “Are you allowed to have vanilla porter during pregnancy” – It depends on your doctor. Details can be found here.
- “Seductive archives” – Oh baby… these archives are über seductive!
- “Escalator joke” – What did the escalator say to the elevator? I’m taking Prozac for my ups and downs.
- “Cartoon flatulence sounds” – Animated gas is rancid. Cartoonists have an uncanny talent for over-exaggeratation.
- “Brutus Beefcake Rob Ford” – No joke needed for this one. Rob Ford has a knack for that.
- “Why are fwthets not allowed in ultrasound” – It seems fwthets and fathers experience the same fate when when it comes to the ultrasound room.
- “Can a grandparent experience morning sickness” – Definitely not. The only thing my mother experiences is massive biceps and and a wrinkle free face.
- “Grandmother makes son were dresses” – Somehow I feel like this person knows me personally. Another link-back to “Grandparent Egocentrism”.
- “Eyelash display rack for sale” – Boy do I have the perfect display rack for you.
- “I peed on the floor” – Yes… keeping things classy as always.
So there you have it. Those were my favourite top google searches for ModernHouseDad.com this year. I hope you enjoyed them as much as I did. Keep plugging in bizarre word combinations for next year!
ModernHouseDad.com 
I love these kinds of posts. I especially like that someone searched, “I peed on the floor.” Very classy indeed. And I liked the specificity of the “Vanilla Porter during pregnancy.” Vanilla Porter is ok, all other booze is a nono.
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Coffee porter is a definite no-no.
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A no-no-no.
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